Time Well Spent

I’ve been trying to write something eloquent about Josh and the New Year for a couple days but it just hasn’t been in me. All I know is that I miss him terribly and I’m not really sure I can express it in a written organized fashion. I’m much better with the image, both still and moving, rather than prose. That’s why I updated the header with pictures of Josh instead.

I don’t have a lot of memories of Josh around the Holidays because, I assume, that he was spending his time with his family, as it should be. I do recall one occasion though on December 31st 1999. My whole family had gone out of town for the New Year’s holiday but I chose to stay behind. Josh rang me up and invited me to hang out with him. He was heading out to McMinnville to lend moral support to the Hollywood Lights folks that had to work New Year’s at Spirit Mountain Casino.

We didn’t really do much of anything but watch Mark play video games, make fun of the lame news broadcasts from around the world, and walk around the nearly abandoned streets at midnight. It’s funny because there was no big party and yet… I have so very clear memories of that night and morning… because I was with Josh.

I was somewhat overwhelmed by the coming of the year 2000 because I hadn’t really thought about my life beyond the 20th Century. The time period beyond the year 2000 was the future and that was it. Now I find that I’m having that same feelings again but with extreme sadness and loss rather than wonderment. I’m approaching middle age and I realize that if I’m blessed with any sort of longish life I’ll have decades without Josh. I try not to dwell on things like this too much but on New Year’s Day it’s hard not to.

I was honored to call Josh my friend for nineteen years and I started this blog so that I could still make wonderful discoveries about him despite the fact that he's gone for all the New Year's to come.

The New Year

In just a few hours we will be starting our first year without Josh. I'm not looking forward to it. Josh brought a lot of joy and good to the world just by his being in it. Josh was truly one of the very good people in this world. I know we all miss him terribly.

I suggest that we, Josh's friends and family, have a responsibility to the world now. We have to try and take Josh's place in being agents for good. It will be tough. It's the very rare person who could be like Josh. But there are a lot of Josh's friends and family out there. And if each of us just does a little more to be kind, help people, and take responsibility for our surroundings, perhaps we can make a little dent in this messed up world.

Just like Josh did.

I hope that the coming year is a better one, and that the pain of losing Josh wanes a bit for all of us.

And if you find yourself unsure of what to do at any point during the coming year, just ask yourself, "What would Josh do?"

Love and best wishes to you all.